Patience is a virtue.... right?

2013... holy crap we could have a kid this year. That is a bizarre thought. The holidays afforded me many wonderful opportunities; time with my family, time off work, parties, gifts, the list goes on. And yet, I did not have one moment to stop and rest. It seems that even though we chose to stay home for the holidays this year, we were still bouncing from one event to the next. In hindsight it was the best gift of all. I didn't have one moment to stop and think that this was the holiday season that I had planned on sharing with a little one.
When Peter and I first started "trying" oh so long ago I was sure the 2012 christmas would be one filled with taking on the role of Santa and setting up traditions for the family we would surely have. Funny... those moments when you realize God is laughing at your well thought out and incredibly detailed "plans." When we decided to move into the adoption route my heart finally settled and the stress in our lives melted away. I was able to spend my free time, formally focused on the detailed pictures inside my head of the perfect way to tell our families we were expecting, now in a more productive manner. I stayed up late nights (with Peter as well!) researching, formatting bank statements, writing autobiographies and somehow my new focus made more sense. Surely this is how EVERYONE should have babies. For some strange reason this system of proving our worth to governments, agencies and now the birth parent has seemed the most natural way for us got go about bringing a baby into our lives. With our profiles finally going live shortly before Christmas, there were parties to attend, cakes to bake and little time to feel like we were "waiting."
And yet tonight... Peter is off to the church chili cookoff and I am taking a Sunday evening to myself. Texting my sisters (sis-in-laws, but same thing) and almost feeling like there is a baby in the next room... at least there should be. I totally trust the process we are on and long ago gave my worry back to God. I know the time will be perfect when it happens. I know there is a greater plan for us than we could have ever made for ourselves. I know that... and still, on quiet nights, I can't help but look foward to the nights that aren't so quiet. The ones filled with tears and comforting, milk-induced baby comas and a kitchen sink full of dirty dishes because listening to baby giggles was far more important. I know that time is coming.
We made a baby bag with onesies and diapers, filled with all the fixin's of baby needs. Peter, being the wonderful husband that he is found the perfect neutral onesie for us, just in case we had to dash out the door. It is white with a green turtle and the phrase "Worth the Wait." Too perfect and also comforting, for I know that in the end this child will surely be worth every moment of wait.

Still running the race, fighting the fight, and keeping the faith,

B

Website & Home Study... DONE!

Well, I got on my computer tonight to write an overdue blog post and after checking my email, I now have more to share... On Wednesday, December 19th our web profile's went live!! Which essentially means we are now viewable to potential birthmothers!! We are so happy to have that huge leg of the journey completed. The adoption web profiles required a minimum of 32 photos each, and not only that, but specific photos ie. action shots together and separately, no sunglasses, no hats, and so on. It seems like finding 32 photos that describe your life and hobbies would not be difficult, however, it proved to be quite the daunting task. To have those profiles live and available to potential birthmothers is an amazing feeling. It is also somewhat strange to think that somewhere out in the world potential birthparents are viewing our information.
The second piece of good news is that our home study report is finished!!! This means that we are done with all preliminary paperwork! Hot Dog!

So with our home study done and our web profiles live the following scenarios could take place next. 1. We could be contacted by our Client Liason at ANLC with information that a birth mom would like to meet us via skype, or phone call. From there if she decides to select us as the adoptive parents then we are presented with an "adoption opportunity" and based on what we know of the situation we can either accept or decline the opportunity. If we decline there is no penalty, we continue on as normal until the next birth mom comes along.

2. We have elected to accept an immediate birth opportunity. This means that we could get a phone call any day from our Client Liason at ANLC telling us that a baby was born that day/night in whatever state and we can come right away to accept the child. This is a highly unlikely scenario, however, it is a potential option.

Please keep us in your hearts and prayers over the next few weeks. We are confident and at peace knowing that our part of the process is complete and we are right where we need to be. We hope you all have a wonderful happy, healthy Christmas!!

Much love to you all,

Barrett, Peter, Bella & Oakley

FBI Approval!

Ok so not that we were expecting anything different... but we did receive our FBI clearances today! Horray! Turns out Peter and I do not have any warrants out for our arrest, nor have we ever been arrested. Surprising? No, but still exciting to have one more piece of the puzzle completed. I spoke with our Media Consultant at our agency this morning and she will begin composing our web profiles next week. This FBI approval also means that our homestudy report is officially completed. Seemingly small things that make a big impact.

We spent the evening decorating our home for Christmas and rearranging furniture in the living room to accommodate a big beautiful tree! (coming on Saturday) We will travel to Boone NC on Saturday morning to select our tree and strap it to the car like the Griswolds. Classy. It is one of my most favorite holiday traditions as my parents and brother also join us in the hunt for the perfect tree. After a hay ride while they bundle and pack our tree we head to a delicious lunch at Woodlands BBQ and finally head home along to Blue Ridge Parkway to take some family photos... SO FUN! If you think this is bad just wait until we have a baby... :)

Wishing you great joy and little frustration in your holiday decorating!
B,P, Bella & Oakley

Happy Thanksgiving!

Whew what a day! We were fortunate enough to be able to host some of Peter's family at our home for a Thanksgiving feast (Turkey, stuffing, gravy, broccoli salad, potato salad, sweet potato casserole, greenbean casserole, rolls, and pies!) We had such a wonderful time catching up, cooking, and relaxing on the couch together. Bella and Oakley were more than happy to have extra hands around to throw the ball and give belly rubs. Peter's Dad took them on two walks so they are thoroughly exhausted and now passed out in the living room next to Peter. Peter's sister is expecting her first baby next spring (and his brother's wife just had their second baby!!) so next Thanksgiving will be full of babies. It was truly joyous to spend time chatting about all of the fun that lay ahead for each of us. There is so much to be thankful for in this season, not only our health, happiness, homes and families, but the opportunity we have been given on this adoption journey. We are only in the beginning stages and already we have felt more love and support from our community than most know in a lifetime and for that we are truly grateful.

On a fun note, I (B) went to Buy Buy Baby last weekend with mom to begin looking at baby furniture, strollers, and all things baby. It was way too much fun and I am so excited to begin decorating our baby room. We did a lot of rearranging and painting this fall to prepare a fresh clean room for baby. Grey/White walls, and a chair rail are all we have so far. I have selected fabrics to make the window treatments and bedding with my mom at some point. I will post pictures when I get a chance! Finally, we get past the paperwork to a fun part of this process. :)

Wishing you all a happy healthy Thanksgiving full of love!!!
Barrett, Peter, Oakley & Bella

Sharing the news...

On Sunday, October 21st we were about to bust! The secret had been kept for so long and we needed to share. We called our parents and told them the news. They were over the moon! We had great conversations and are so happy to have their support. The following Friday we had our great family friends over to share the news with them. Below is the video of their reactions. It is quite comical. We have since told more family, more friends, our respective staffs, and anyone else we happen to bump into. For those of you who know Barrett, keeping a secret like this for three months is a feat beyond all measure, worthy of at least one large cookie cake, or at the least a small trophy. Work on that, Peter! We sent out a letter to our extended families and friends and are excited to hear their reactions as they receive news this week. It is so awesome to be able to share the news and have everyone share in this excitement with us.

SBI Approval!

Whew! We received news this evening that our SBI Fingerprint Background checks were reviewed and we have no criminal history! Ok, so we pretty much knew that, but it is nice to have one more step done!

We also spoke with our media consultant through ANLC last week to discuss photos and information for our online web profile. We spent some time this past weekend getting photos together and while Peter is gone this week for continuing education I am enjoying some quiet time and writing out information for our profile. Our web profile should be live and open to birthmothers by Thanksgiving! We will certainly be thankful for that :)

Love to all,
B, Bella & Oakley

Our process thus far...

So what is the adoption process today?
LONG! and wild! and fun! and long!

We first had to decide how we wanted to go about this. Did we want an infant, older child, domestic or international? We decided on a domestic infant adoption which means we would be matched with a birthmother from anywhere within the United States. After referrals from friends and some intense researching we selected the Adoption Network Law Center to facilitate our adoption process. They work all over the country matching birthparents with adoptive parents. We loved the idea of having the birthparents select us. Next, it was time to begin the process with ANLC. We filled out an application detailing every aspect of our life from our jobs to dogs to family life. We were set up with a counselor and received news that we had been approved! Next step was the Home Study... We had another very large application to fill out. It included the following:
- Police fingerprint scans
- SBI background check
- FBI background check
- Child Abuse registry background check
- Financial history report
- county background check
- medical reports and physical exams, blood work, TB tests, psych evaluations
- written autobiographies
- questionnaire detailing our goals and desires in adoption
- three letters of reference
Lots of work! But very worth it! We have had our first meeting with the homestudy agent and are anxiously awaiting our second. After that meeting our "homestudy report" will be written up and sent to our adoption agency stating that we have been referred for adoption. And after all of that craziness... we will make a profile for birthmothers to view. Our profile will consist of pictures, information about our home, family & life, and a Dear Birthmother letter. The birthparents will have an opportunity to review these items and decide if they want to "meet" us. We will set up a meeting via skype and ask/answer all sorts of questions. From there we will be notified if the birth parents select us. If they do, then we have the opportunity to decide to accept the opportunity. If we accept then we are matched! If not, then we wait for the next opportunity.
Once we are matched we wait for the baby to come! This could be any amount of time as it depends on where the birthmother is in her pregnancy. As soon as the baby arrives or is on the way, we will be notified and go to meet the baby and bring him/her home!

Sounds wild right?! It is! We have had such a wonderfully fun time answering these questions and taking the time to talk through some huge issues. We are truly grateful for how this opportunity has blessed us thus far and we are anticipating the opportunities to learn more about each other that lay ahead!!

much love to all!
B,P, Oakley & Bella